Really Bad Vending Machine Ideas [UPDATED] : Renegade Health Infographics

Sunday Jun 17 | BY |
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Hey everyone, just wanted to share that we’ve updated the “Really Bad Vending Machine Ideas” infographic — if you want to call it that… it’s more like a scary-fun-fo-graphic. This was inspired by the Let’s Pizza machine which you can read about here.

Here it is in it’s completeness. Be sure to spread it around if you find it amazing. The good news (or bad news) is that I have another idea that I’ll be working on in the next few weeks.

Click on the graphic to see it in full size. Below the graphic are some additional comments on the machines.

If you’re interested in reading further, here are some more details…

Pop-It Prescription

This is a simple vending machine with a touch screen that asks you a series of 10-15 health questions then prescribes you the medication that you need based on the answers. It’s a perfect alternative to seeing the doctor since it takes the same amount of time to run through the questionnaire as the average doctor spends with their patients.

The Bariatric Bubble

This somewhat larger than normal vending machine is a street side lap belt surgery machine. Customers put in $1.00 to unlatch the door, then strap themselves into an upright gurney. When they close and latch the door, mechanical arms with scalpels attached perform lap band surgery, gastric bypass or sleeve gastrectomy in 5-10 minutes. Once you’re sowed up, the door unlatches and you can go on with your day. This procedure is not covered by insurance.

The “Make It, Fake It, Take It” Machine

This machine is your standard vending machine with a twist. Each machine is stocked with your regular vending machine snacks — pretzels, candy bars, gum — but you have the option to add additional artificial ingredients to any item you choose to order. If you want extra artificial watermelon flavor in your Bubblicious, just hit K, 7, and choose how many milliliters you’d like. Once you’ve chosen a robot arm will inject your gum with a massive flavor burst. If you want to add high fructose corn syrup to your Milky Way, punch in E then 1. MSG to your Cheez-Its? A and 3. The combinations are endless with up to 50,000 variations. Please note: Federal regulations only allow up to 5 milligrams of Butylated hydroxytoluene (BHT) per item.

Live Awesome!

Kevin Gianni

Kevin Gianni is a health author, activist and blogger. He started seriously researching personal and preventative natural health therapies in 2002 when he was struck with the reality that cancer ran deep in his family and if he didn’t change the way he was living — he might go down that same path. Since then, he’s written and edited 6 books on the subject of natural health, diet and fitness. During this time, he’s constantly been humbled by what experts claim they know and what actually is true. This has led him to experiment with many diets and protocols — including vegan, raw food, fasting, medical treatments and more — to find out what is myth and what really works in the real world.

Kevin has also traveled around the world searching for the best protocols, foods, medicines and clinics around and bringing them to the readers of his blog — which is one of the most widely read natural health blogs in the world with hundreds of thousands of visitors a month from over 150 countries around the world.


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  1. zyxomma says:

    When I was younger, I had a good friend whose mother constantly admonished him, “Don’t feed machines!!”

    I even drew a little comic strip of him, about to make a purchase from a vending machine, with a vision of his mother speaking her signature line. Knowing him, he probably still has the drawing.

    Health and peace, and don’t feed machines!

  2. Devi says:

    Very funny, lol. I like it.

  3. Hahaha these are funny.

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